Wednesday, February 25, 2009

warning: i'm pregnant and this is SAPPY

i keep a baby blog separately from this blog -- which i update ALLTHETIME because i'm obsessed and i don't want to bog down this blog with every little thing. hence this blog being a bit neglected.

well, i'm feeling VERY EMOTIONAL today (shut it). so much so that i want to post this here, too. and once you read it, i'm sure you'll be glad i don't bombard you with this kind of baby stuff all the time. ;)

21 weeks and that's all that matters
i'm having a shit time at work lately. and i've gotten so upset about it... like ridiculously upset. and then, with one little kick from within, i realized what a waste of time and energy that was.

how in the WORLD can i be upset over work? i am insanely grateful and BEYOND blessed to be kicked day and night by my little bean, who is now almost a pound and almost a foot long. my bean, with a strong, beating heart. proving to me every day that miracles do exist and i can't believe my good luck that i get to experience one.

those kicks humble me because somewhere, someone thinks i am WORTHY of carrying this living miracle. that i am capable of bringing that life into this world.

i don't care how awful my job is, i am lucky to have one. i have an amazing husband who will be an even more amazing father. i have a safe, (somewhat drafty) home, incredible friends and family and i'm 19 short weeks away (god willing) from being a mother. A MOTHER. i intend to savor every single kick and be grateful for every moment i am lucky enough to have.

that is what counts. i love you, bean. thank you for your constant reminders. i can't wait to kiss the toes on those kicky little feet. i promise, with everything that i have, that i will be the best mother i can be to you.

AND, per president obama, i promise i won't let you drop out of high school. ;)


Pickles and Dimes said...

Nothing like having someone put things in perspective, huh?

Where is your baby blog? Is it private?

Danse said...

This is such a sweet post! The bean is so lucky to have such wonderful parents waiting for him/her.

Tess said...

Erm, WHERE is this baby blog and CAN I READ IT?

The kicks are the best. Even an emotional cripple like me melted. True story.