Friday, December 28, 2007

very exclusive.

so tonight i had a pajama party with my sister and my nephew. when they walked in after work (at 5:45pm) i was already IN my pajamas, complete with glass of pinot noir.

i told them there are RULES to this pajama party. hunter agreed immediately. i said, "don't you want to know what the rules are before you blindly agree??" he didn't really care, so i fired away:
  1. you must be in pajamas
  2. you must party
  3. you must have a special drink
  4. you must eat until your belly hurts

he was like, well DUH, OF COURSE I AGREE!! so, melanie switched her special drink between heineken light and amstel light ( i prefer HL. i HATE regular heineken, however. just in case you wanted to send me beer or something.), i stuck with the wine and hunter had several shirley temples.

we ate: mozzerella sticks, egg noodles with butter and cheese, pigs in a blanket, salad with chicken, tortilla chips with spinach artichoke dip AND hot fudge sundaes. shut up, there was a randomly healthy salad involved. it's a PARTY, for christ sake!

hunter was a little disappointed because we didn't have "special effects" -- he is hosting a new year's eve party and said it will include a disco ball. i totally failed in the special effects department.

he also let us in on a VERY top secret fact about polar bears... did you know if they aren't "developed" properly, they just turn into seals? and if seals don't develop properly they turn into whales. hey, thanks animal planet. you're CLEARLY teaching him a lot. oh yes, and while orangutan is SPELLED o-r-a-n-g-u-t-a-n , it's pronounced "o-rang-uh-tang" -- he will not budge on this. yum, tang...

ps, i think i'm getting sick again, but did i take airborne today? no. instead i drank basically a bottle of pinot noir. eh, same diff. CHEERS.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

wait, it's over?

christmas came and went in a flash this year. in the blink of an eye. without warning. or more accurately, while i was in DENIAL. how the hell did it get here so FAST?? i had no prep time.

or at least, i felt like i didn't. i blamed the wedding, but let's be honest, people. the wedding was 11/3 and we were back from the honeymoon on the 12th. i should have been out beating up strangers on black friday with the rest of you. or at least -- online shopping!!!! that requires about ZERO effort. ugh. i suck.

i did manage to get the tree up and get gifts for everyone, but don't think i wasn't out shopping on christmas eve, because i totally was. i think tom and i did ok for family gifts, but i just wish i had more time (wasn't so lazy?) to really put 100% thought into each and every one. hahahaha who am i kidding, gift cards for all, forever!!!

and speaking of gift cards, i always hear that is a lame ass gift and people feel like you cheesed out on them if you give them a gift card. that? is a little thing i like to call bullshit. i LOVE getting gift cards. i have a STACK of them that i am staring at right now and planning how to use. ooooh i cannot wait. coffee, clothes, shoes, gas, electronics -- hell to the YEAH, santa!!!

tom got me great gifts -- did i mention that walgreens is his favorite place to get gifts? it is. i received three "as seen on tv" items and don't hate. i love infomercial merchandise. i also got an ipod nano!!! yahoo! this is an especially excellent gift because my sad little mini was swiped (or more likely left on the plane) on our honeymoon and i have that work trip to london in february.
i need plane distractions. me + plane = fucking freakout. my flight to heathrow is like 71, 356 hours. nonstop. i might implode from fear. i don't have any real reasons to dislike flying -- just a generally irrational and primal FEAR. the ipod and all it's fun little games and VIDEO capabilities will help whatever my (hopefully) prescribed anti-freakout medication can't handle.
so, yay for tom!! i may survive this trip!

we spent christmas eve with my sister and nephew and exchanged presents and ate pizza (and drank lots of wine). opened gifts yesterday morning at our house, then we all went over to tom's parents' for dinner and more awesome gifts. last night was spent downloading friends episodes onto the ipod and watching elf. "we elves like to stick to the four major food groups: candy, candy canes, candy CORN and syrup!"

Saturday, December 22, 2007

At the casino. Tom is in the back left corner.

Friday, December 21, 2007

for those of you bored on this friday before christmas....

here is a grainy, crappy cell phone movie of hunter last year doing his genius rendition of jingle bells. it's the instrumental version. he's like the trans siberian orchestra, party of one.

except, his guitar is made out of paper.

he asked me for a guitar and i said, um, we don't have one. so he asked me to make him one. MAKE him one. so i drew something akin to a beat down ukelele on a piece of construction paper. hahahahaha NOT EVEN CARDBOARD. and put some yarn strings on it. it's so lame. ENJOY!!

Monday, December 17, 2007

my car is an asshole

so this morning on my drive into work, i'm behind a giant suv. it's, of course, spraying ice and sand and all sorts of winter wonderland all over my windshield. SO, i think, as any NORMAL driver would, hey, let's just spray some washer fluid and wipe that shit right off.
i press the button, the washer stuff squirts right up and my wipers come up like normal... until about the halfway point -- you know, the part that's RIGHT IN MY LINE OF VISION -- and decide they're done for the day.
that's right. they just stopped. they stared at me as if to say, fuck you, stephanie, have fun driving 45 minutes on the highway with windshield washer fluid frozen to your windshield. also, enjoy the added bonus of wipers blocking about 75% of your view. let's not forget the overall shitty weather conditions and the fact that this car is a 1998 honda civic that is generally awful in any sort of inclement weather.

Friday, December 14, 2007

x mas tree, fireplace and SNL x mas special. NICE.

Thursday, December 13, 2007


remember snow? the guy who sang, sorry... RAPPED "informer" ????

no? just me?

anyway, i'm reminded of him today because:

fucking blizzard

10 inches apparently on the way.


fucking traffic

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

have any of you been to london?

i'm going in february (yes, i realize that is PEAK WEATHER) and tom's meeting me at the end of my conference for a long weekend in london. the thing is... WHERE SHOULD WE STAY? what should we do? i have never been and i need ideas and places to see and visit.

yes, i realize i could google stuff and go on tripadvisor and all that, but i'd rather get some real recommendations from you guys, if you have any (read: i'd rather you do my leg work).


Tuesday, December 11, 2007

squid ammo!!!

what a freakin slacker i am. nearly two weeks without a post. i blame messing with texas. she shamed me for only having 15 blogs in my google reader, so i ventured more...added a ton more and now ALL I HAVE TIME TO DO IS READ. which i suppose isn't fair. i'm lazing around, reading everyone else's blog and totally not contributing. well, i comment -- does that count for anything!? probably not. listen, i'm lazy. i know my husband reads this. comment tom, and TELL THEM how lazy i am.

anyway, i worked at a Certain Big Toy Store this weekend to help educate our consumers on the total awesomeness of buying our product over some other lame-o biter brand and fell in love with this totally random (to me, because i don't have any of the accompanying product line) accessory:
squid ammo. or snot. you decide.

it's seriously called squid ammo. it's all rubbery and snotty and i love it. so i bought some. again, i have NO USE for this. i don't have the weapon with which to fire said squid ammo, but i have seven pieces of it regardless.

in other news, it's officially two weeks till christmas. i've got about oooooh 92% of my shopping LEFT to do. how about you? i'm sure you're all finished, have it wrapped and mailed out and all that. we've received several holiday cards already. hi, real-life friends? please excuse us, tom and i haven't even finished our thank you cards from november. no christmas cards this year. HAPPY HOLIDAYS FROM THE SLACKER FAMILY!!

our wedding was 11/3. am i a total asshole for not having the cards done yet? please say no. i still have like 80 left.